It’s an interesting question and a valid question in today’s world. The speed and the methods for connecting with each other are great. As a coach, I love to connect with people. It’s in my nature. However, I find it’s very odd that we are seeing rates of depression, anxiety, and loneliness sky-rocket, especially in our young women. Could there be a connection to the increase in use of social media and the rates of depression, anxiety, and loneliness? According to Psychology Today, there is. I believe that one of the keys to this phenomenon has to do with our society losing its ability to have quality in person conversations. Conversation, through words, is one of the greatest attributes of humankind. We’re the only species who can communicate like this. This fact makes me wonder: how important are actual conversations? I’m talking about face-to-face and voice-to-voice interactions with another person. Have you noticed that it’s becoming less and less comfortable to pick up the phone and talk with someone? Most people prefer to text, instant message, or email someone rather than talk with them. Can you even have a true, quality relationship without face-to-face conversations? If our ability to have conversations is one of the key things that sets us apart from other species, then would it be damaging to stop having those conversations? I believe the answer is, “Yes!”
As I shared with you earlier, the rates of depression, anxiety and loneliness are sky rocketing in our youth, especially in our young women. As a parent, this fact deeply disturbs me. I want my children to go farther than I did. I want them to be more successful than I am. A major stumbling block, like depression or anxiety, could stop my children from being all that they can be. What is one thing that I can do to prevent my children from experiencing this? I believe that teaching them how to have great conversations and great relationships by modeling it for them is one real way to help them avoid this stumbling block.
How do you know if your relationships are not at the level they could and should be? Check the quality of your conversations. The quality of our conversations is the measurement of the quality of our relationships. Let’s look at a marital relationship as an example. If you’re married, or know someone who is, how did you and your spouse create the foundation of this relationship which the both of you believed to be strong enough to support a lifetime commitment? I would bet that you began with some simple face-to-face conversations, and each additional face-to-face conversation strengthened the relationship. Personally, if my husband and I go for a time period without a quality face-to-face conversation, then our relationship suffers. Could you imagine a marriage built on solely social media or texting contact? It’s a ridiculous idea, I know.
Ask yourself these questions, “How often do I have quality face-to-face connections with my friends? How often do I have quality face-to-face connections with my family?” If you didn’t like your answers, then I would encourage you to do something about it. One amazing tool which changed the way I had conversations and built relationships with everyone is something called Real Talk Training. I gave a few hours of my life and gained the knowledge of how I had been communicating, how I wanted to communicate, and began practicing the new way. This one training took me from a mediocre communicator to an excellent communicator. Even more important, my relationships have improved by a hundredfold. If this tool sounds like something you need in your toolbox, then don’t waste another day. Your key to excellent conversations and relationships is right here.